What's the only good thing about hitting bottom? There's only 1 way to go...up.
I survived the stomach bug and made it to my meetings yesterday without incident. Yeah! I felt the absence of my traveling friend but she's doing fine wherever she is. GOD bless her.
One of the topics was how some of us may need help from professionals from time to time. No kidding. I certainly wouldn't take my dental problems to my sponsor or ask her help for chiropractic problems, etc. My sponsor signed-up to work me through the Steps and to help keep me honest...not to be my doctor, therapist, or what other professional I may need to consult. Although she may have some kind of expertise or license under her belt that is not what qualifies her to be my sponsor. What qualifies her is she has taken the 12 Steps and is willing to pass it on by helping someone else take the Steps. We cannot give what we do not have and we cannot have it if we do not give it away. This is my experience in recovery. It is about the Steps, all about the Steps that lead to Divine Intervention.
The Fellowship is important, too. The camaraderie of those who survived the flames of Addiction Hell. We have been through hell. We who have survived know what it took...the Grace of GOD. We asked for help and it arrived in Divine Intervention otherwise we would be another statistic on somebody's number chart.
Before I ever arrived to the rooms of the 12 Steps there were multiple incidents of Divine Intervention where my Higher Power was obviously taking care of me and I was blind, I didn't see.
Once I had just received a ticket from a police officer because my car's inspection sticker was expired, the registration sticker was expired and I had no insurance. The children's father was in jail again, my children were crying because they were frightened, I was pregnant, the car had no air conditioning, no money to fix it, barely enough gas to drop them off at the babysitter and to make it to work where I hoped to ask for a $20 advance just to make it to payday. The sizzling, sweltering heat oppressed even more when I drove up to the STOP sign. I just couldn't take it anymore and I started crying, too. So there we were. I cried big sobs of grief, overwhelmed by how ineffectual and inadequate I felt in that moment. After a while a slight whisper of a breeze blew through the car and it felt so good. Then another and another. I kept crying but in-between my sobs I heard a light tapping sound that wouldn't stop. Finally lifting my head, I saw the tapping came from a little stack of phamplets I'd stuck on top of the car dashboard. The gentle breeze was rifling the paper. I reached over to remove it so the annoying, insistent tap-tap-tap would stop and that is the first time in my life I ever read, "Footprints".
In that moment I knew I was being carried and it made all the difference in the world to know I wasn't alone...Thank GOD for Divine Intervention.
