The Magic of Recovery

I remember way back when Atari had a simple tennis game where a player hit a dot which represented a ball.  The ball began at a slow speed but went faster and faster after each volley.  I spent a lot of time hitting that darn ball.  There was something hypnotic about this game.  Then came PAC-Man, Tetris, etc.  After a while I was too buy to play video games but I was aware of them.  There was one game in particular where the player was on some kind of quest and was gifted with magic potions, powers, gold coins, or whatever else when it achieved whatever that earned the boon.   Walls that were barriers disappeared, bridges materialized to span the gaps, etc.  I felt fascinated with this game because of the magical aspects of it.

Recovery has the same feelings of magical qualities.  Boundaries are now in place where there were none.  Where there was no hope, there is now.  The greatest gnashing of teeth, crying despair, grieving sobs are hushed by walking the Steps that lead to the heartfelt surrender to the still, silent, serene pool of my Higher Power's love in the Sunlight of the Spirit.  Where all is well with my soul quieted, comforted and protected by the Creator, from whence I came and will return.  Now, that is true magic. 

I must remember this when caught up in the drama of living life.  When a mistake seems to mushroom into gigantic proportions as automatic inner thoughts begin their wailing laments of how stupid I am, I'll never get it right, why bother?, why try?, I'm worthless, unworthy, I hate me, I'm no good, why am I even alive?,  on and on.  Or just as easily the whip of condemnation can switch onto others as I judge and criticize people, places, and things rather than myself.  The thunderous clamor beating an insistent negative dramatic 2 note bass-line like the one on the movie, "Jaws".  Jeesh.  

That's why I practice the Steps on the days when there's not a cloud in the sky, not a blip on the radar, not a fly in the soup.  So I can be ready for the moments of Life's inevitable tailspins when I go slipping, skidding and sliding all over the place, bumping into walls and other people.  My experience is I'm much quicker to go to Step 1 and working the Steps.  Thank GOD...it works when I work it.